Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
