Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
