you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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