I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize