i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
