can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
