she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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