Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He's on the porch naked. Help.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
