If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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