I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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