I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
These tits shall not be calmed
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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