I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
