Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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