hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
