I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
