I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Please don't give away my fajitas
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
