Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
