One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
