her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
it's like iHOP with fire
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
