Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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