You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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