carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize