I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
