FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
