i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
