Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
she peed on how many people?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
