I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
