You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
