Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
