Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
