I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
