If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
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