I hope mine doesn't look like that
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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