we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
