Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
He shit in the fireplace
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
