i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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