I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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