Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
