we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
