Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
