Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
