Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize