Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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