so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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