I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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