the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
