She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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