So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize