I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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