So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
