im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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